following the Dance (LJIdol -- Week 2)

[vik_thor]

"Dance, then, wherever you may be,
I am the Lord of the Dance, said he,
And I'll lead you all, where ever you may be,
And I'll lead you all in the Dance, said he."
--Sydney Carter

I am a follower of the Lord of the Dance. Not Yeshua, who this version of the song is putatively for, but rather Shiva Nataraja, Pan, Dionysus, Kernun. I have a hard time staying still when there is music playing. It can be as small as finger or foot tapping, to full out dancing where I can take over the entire dance floor.

I don't remember anything specifically dance related in my childhood or adolescence. The earliest dancing memory I have is of 'The Beauty and the Beast' dance that was held around Halloween. I had been coming out of my shell more and more over the past year, and my girlfriend and I were participating in the costume contest, as sorcerer and sorceress. It took me awhile to gather my courage up to actually get out on the dance floor, but once I did, I stayed there the rest of the night, only stopping to get something to drink, and to rest during the slow songs. The other school dances during my senior year went similarly. I had discovered my joy in dancing.

Dancing during college happened, mostly just me and my WalkMan. The only gay bar in town wasn't dance oriented.

The first time I really felt Nataraja was during my 18 months in San Francisco, after college graduation. I was involved with the Black Leather Wings tribe of the Radical Faeries. I was in a ritual when, the closest I can describe, i was possessed or ridden by Him. At that time, i felt … connected to the entire cycle of being.

"Around its center in an open gyre
earth turns, the day:
around the earth in an open gyre
moon turns, the month:
around the sun in an open gyre
earth turns, the year:
around its center in an open gyre
sun turns, the dance:
sun and the other stars in an open gyre
turn and return, the dance."
-- Ursula K. Le Guin, Always Coming Home "The Gyres" from the Fourth Section of Poems

I … have never felt quite that connection again. But i feel echoes when dancing by myself, just moving to the music, letting the music move me.

(My style of dance [if it can be called that] is entirely self taught. I move to the music, and thus each song can feel different, and have different movements. I do borrow heavily from Hindu dance that I've seen, but… I have never seen a video of myself dancing. I don't really want to, I'm afraid that if I do, I will feel too self-conscious to ever dance again.)

Comments

[meridian_rose]

This delights me on a number of levels. Sadly I've never felt that level of connection. It sounds amazing.

[vik_thor]

thank you!

[rayaso.livejournal.com]

I'm not a dancer, so I was very glad to read this entry. It was nicely done!

[vik_thor]

thank you!

[bleodswean.livejournal.com]

Glad to see a Pan-worshiper writing about the experience of dance!

[vik_thor]

:)
thanks!

[sinnamongirl.livejournal.com]

I loved this! I love to dance myself; I've taken a few dance classes but nothing is better than that let-go, flailing, sweating, swirling type of dance. I have, however, never had a sense of being ridden and that sounds beautiful.

[vik_thor]

thank you!

that is a fairly good description of my dancing: let-go, flailing, stating, swirling. I used to actually wear a gauze skirt when I was dancing, for even more swirliness! :)

[sinnamongirl.livejournal.com]

Yes! A nice gauzy skirt (especially with some sparkles thrown in) is so awesome to dance in.

[halfshellvenus.livejournal.com]

Your experience makes me think of things I've heard about the Loa (Haitian deities exported from Africa), which includes dance and which believers say includes being ridden by those spirits at times. Here's a link: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Loa

I liked the footnote at the bottom. No matter what we're doing, we're likely to feel self-conscious watching ourselves do it-- we judge in a way others probably would not. Best not to even go there!

[vik_thor]

»nods«
I have heard about the Loa, and that phrasing was deliberate.
(and was used by some of the other participants in the ritual at the time)

[eternal-ot.livejournal.com]

I learned Bharatnatyam while I was in school,so could relate to feeling Nataraja in your body..:) A Nice entry.. made me nostalgic.

[vik_thor]

thank you!

I think Bharatnatyam may be the style of dance I was influenced by (at least by seeing some of the video.) with the arm movements, as well as the legs.

[whipchick.livejournal.com]

I never want to see a video of myself dancing, either :) This really felt like a window into your heart - thank you!

[vik_thor]

thanks!

[adoptedwriter.livejournal.com]

Dance of any type is powerful and therapeutic. That's why I do Zumba. I teach it. Almost wrote about it this week. I discovered dance in college too when I didn't have anyone around to laugh at me. AW

[vik_thor]

so Zumba is basically dancercise? are the steps choreographed, or more freeform?
(I think my gym offers Zumba classes. I may be interested in taking it as part of my workout…)

[adoptedwriter.livejournal.com]

It is Latin Jazzercise...Latin and "world" music-dominated, but some mainstream pop os ok too. Steps are choreographed. Every instructor is a bit different. I love the creative freedom to make up our own moves and steps rooted from some basic ideas.

AW

[misfitmanor.livejournal.com]

I love that you're willing to keep dancing, no matter what it looks like. Really, what does it matter who cares? You dance for you, as well you should. Like the man says, "If it's in ya, it's got to come OUT!" Good for you!

~karmasoup

[vik_thor]

thanks!
yeah, it's fun, and a good workout! :)

[alycewilson.livejournal.com]

I know that song you're referencing: we used to sing it at summer church camp. Like you, I believe that dance can be a primal form of communication.

[vik_thor]

I think the first time I heard it was when I was going to a Presbyterian church, sometime in the late 70s. I'm still surprised that it was written as a hymn. it feels much older to me.

(thanks!)

[murielle.livejournal.com]

A very different take on the prompt. This is a new experience for me, outside of my usual experience. In this respect, educational. In the authenticity and heartfelt sharing sense, enlightening.

Very interesting read.

[vik_thor]

thanks!

[prog-schlock.livejournal.com]

Hurray for dancing and hurray for finding the kind of dance that impacts you, even if it has been hard for you to find it again.

At our wedding, my wife and I didn't want to do a normal couples dance, so we danced to this song and both took turns refusing to dance at all, and ended just boogieing instead of close dancing. Then we made everyone else come and dance, because dancing is what its all about.

[vik_thor]

thanks!
that's a fun song, definitely unusual for a wedding couple's dance!