Birthday

[vik_thor]

I apologize for this post.
It is very rambling, and disorganized. But fits how I am feeling.
(almost wish I was a bit drunk... would maybe help the words flow a bit easier...)

Well, I will be hitting 2/5 of century Sunday.
I am not feeling all that great about that right now.... Emotionally I have been a bit of rollercoaster today.

Lately, I have been feeling fairly anti Baby Boomer. (rereading 13th Generation: Abort, retry, fail.)

I’m out with Jos doing his job tonight, largely because I felt very much like not being alone at home tonight.

40 years old... and what do I have to show for it...
Not a whole hell of a lot.

About the only thing that is similar to how I thought my life would be is the fact that I have a husband.
I think I love him... Of course, I don’t really know what love is, so... I will do a lot of stuff for him.
Sometimes, I’m afraid he’s getting bored/tired of me. Now that Sashi/Monte is living with us. their schedule is more compatible than Jos & mine lately.

Sex: occasionally, sort of. It’s always me initiating it. And the last few times, I’ve felt almost like I was forcing him, against his will... Not a feeling I like.
Mostly it’s been major gropeing.

Presidents I Have Known:
Carter: 1977-1980
Reagan: 1981-1988
Bush Sr: 1989-1992
Clinton: 1993-2000
Bush Jr: 2001-2008
And now we have Mrs. Clinton wanting to be president?
Ummm... No thank you Hillary. Let’s let another family have a turn, shall we?
(and excuse me, but a museum dedicated to Woodstock? America, Home of Boomers! (and a few other people.)

I will probably vote for Obama. It’s a plus that he is from Illinois. Bill Richardson, Giuliani.
(hehehe let’s get rid of the amendment that let’s the candidate chose their Veep. whoever comes in 2d should be the Veep.)

What would I change about my life?
well, I should have started my paralegal courses sooner, back when they annouced that Scottsdale would be closing.
My move out here could have been planned better.
I probably should have stayed at the store in Kansas City, rather than moving to Champaign. I didn’t visit family that much more,

I wish I was more outgoing. I have a hard time expressing myself verbally.

People from my past I wish I had kept in contact with:
High School:
Ron Clutts (2 years ahead of me. Introduced me to pop music. (among other things. ;)
Malcolm Morrison, Abe Pender (1 year ahead) Probably my best friends.
Joe Lingle, Sandy Cowsert (girlfriend) (my year)

College:
Steve & Laura Wagner (gamers. Introduced me to Jethro Tull.)

Comments

[javarod.livejournal.com]

Gnaws on you •nom nom nom• "Go read my latest entry, part two of the depression entry I suppose, not sure what you'd call it, it addresses some things here. Don't worry so much, the only thing I'll tell you is to make a decision on the paralegal matter, you want to get into expediting, you like CBS and you want to be a paralegal. Can't have all of that, at least not at your age... our age? Pick a target, and go for it, trust me. Sick of Phoenix? Pick where you'd like to be, I'll follow. I do agree with you about the complex, less so the apartment, we came here 'cause we wanted out of the one downtown (I think that was a good choice), and this was the only option. I definitely want out if at all possible when the lease is done, possibly sooner (housing market makes that worth considering). Remember, we all have regrets, I don't think we'd be human if we didn't, without future sight, we have to wing it and hope for the best, and sometimes the landings aren't to our taste (gee, a few mixed metaphors in there?). I know that I'm not seriously regretting anything long as I have you."